Monday, May 18, 2009

Another Achivement!!!



Staying alone in a flat and that too in an unknown city is indeed a strong decision. But my privacy is much more important....
And I was enjoying it to the fullest......till the day that cockroach appeared in my room!!!
The most unhygienic and weird creature with those moving antennae.....Shit! I hate them all!
On seeing it moving on the floor of my room, I went into complete vacuum... all blank...speechless.....motionless!!!
After a few micro seconds when I came back to my senses, I began to shout- which is indeed a non-voluntary action on seeing such a horror....but I dint....coz I realized no one is coming for help at 3:45 in the morning. Everyone around might be sleeping and would be in their sweetest of dreams while I am fighting this terror!!!
What should I do now???
Should I call the neighbour wali Bhabhi.....She said k koi problem ho toh bula lena...n dis is more than a problem! Should not call her...she might be sleeping. Also, for that, I will have to cross IT as it is near the door...Out of question!
What to do now...it was moving....coming close to my bed....maybe it will get on my bed!
Its gonna kill me today!!!
Suddenly I recalled the ASTRA I have to fight this situation. Knowing myself, I had already arranged a cockroach killing spray.
So I have it with me....just the job is to grab it from kitchen. Meanwhile I threw a rolled piece of paper on it to make it change direction!
Achieving my first target I rushed to the kitchen and returned with my weapon to fight it back...but it disappeared...where to search for it now???
On my bed, on the floor....looked everywhere....dint find it....finally looked behind the door...and there it was....hiding itself....from me indeed!!!

So...is it scared????

Scared from me!!!
Should I kill it???
Suddenly all my fears started disappearing...I started pitting it now!

Then I decided not to kill it.Rather, I took a broom and helped it out of the flat!!!
That was a triumph over my fear...fear against a cockroach!!!

Sunday, May 10, 2009

happy mother's day Ma'




We are sooo accustomed to seeing mom as always giving, that we do not even consider her being ever-supportive rock during our formative years, and as a constant support in our adulthood....

But on this mother's day....when I am far away from you mom, I am remembering of the special efforts you made for making me what I am.

I am missing you Ma'

This is the first time that I am not with you on this day but I wish every joy....every pleasure on your way....

You are my bridge. When I needed to get across, you steadied yourself long enough for me to run across safely.

In all my efforts to learn to read, you have shared fully my ambition and sympathized with me and aided me in every way. If I have done anything in life worth attention, I feel sure that I inherited the disposition from you, my mother.

I remember you on your hands and knees, with mouth full of straight pins, hemming a new dress for me...

I remember you waking with me at nights to help me stay awake during my exams....

I remember you soothing my nerves whenever I had a war with bhai or friends.....

Mumma, you have given me a feeling of trust and stability. You are my earth. You are the one I can count on for the things that matter most of all.

You are my extra blanket when it grows cold in the night; you are my warmth and my health and my shelter...

Font sizeYou are the one I need to be near me when I cry.

I wish I could give you all the comforts of the world. But no matter what I give to you, you give back much, much more.

Today I'm giving you a pure, sweet rose, that I gathered in the early morning......
This is the rose you planted in my heart, the day that I was born!!!
With all the love and all the fond memories of my kinder days....
The rose I give to you today.........is the love that's in my heart.

Luv you always.......

Thursday, May 7, 2009

remembering pa'


My life changed forever!!!

My father died that day, and I lost the greatest man I've ever known. He was the best dad any daughter ever had. My mother, brother and I will never be quite the same.

For the past few years my father had suffered from kidney and heart problems. We all knew that time was precious, and I made a conscious effort to build as many memories as I could. I talked to him whenever I could. He was one of my very best friends, and we were always sharing stories and swapping tales. He was funny and smart, and knew how to fix anything. He was the backbone of our family, and we relied upon his wisdom and advice.

Watching him slowly deteriorate, was heartbreaking for me and our family, because no matter how hard we wished for it, he wasn't going to get better.

My last birthday together....he was soooo happy!!!Being a great composer....he composed and sang a song for me.That was indeed the most beautiful day of my life!

Few bays later, on way to hospital, I remember praying to God, "Please let us have him with us for just a little longer," over and over in my head. But I knew he was never coming home.

When he left us, a part of me died with him. I will never be the same again.

It has taken me so many years to come to terms with his death. I think of him, and miss him every day of my life. However, what they say really is true. The passing of time does help ease the pain of loss. But there are those days when I miss seeing his face, and hearing his voice, and I would give anything in this world to be able to talk to him just one more time.

When I feel especially sad, I tell myself that I am truly blessed to have had such a loving and gentle father. He was my special hero, and I can never thank him enough for all of the things he taught me, and for all of the wonderful memories he has given me to treasure.

Throughout my life, I will honor him by being the best person I can be. He would want me to go on with my life, to be happy. And this is what I will do, as I know he is watching over me.

He is the angel on my shoulder, and I thank God every day for giving me the best dad in the world.

I'll always love you, "Pa".

Rest in peace!!!

nothing remains the same


....and the innocence was lost.....and nothing would ever remain the same.

There was death in that vision.

There was madness.

There was fear.

But it was blurred. I could not see it clearly. I could not see the detail. I did not know if the death and madness were happening to me, or happening around me. And in a sense, I was lost. In too many ways...... i was lost.